Wednesday, January 22, 2014

How to Compliment Girls Part 1 (Finding Things to Compliment)

1.
Evaluate what the girl values in herself. The first thing you’ll want to do is think about the girl and what you know she values in herself. Girls are conditioned to shy away from compliments and she’ll be much more open to accepting a compliment she agrees with. Notice what she’s proud of, from your experiences with her and compliment her on those things.

For example, if she’s clearly very eager to share something she’s done with other people, that’s something you could compliment her on.


2.
Consider what she struggles with or works on. Like yourself or anyone else, she probably likes to have her hard work validated. If you know she’s worked very hard on something or that there’s something she feels inadequate or self-conscious about, you
can try complimenting her on that. This can be tricky though, so be careful how you do it.
For example, if she complains that she hates her nose, tell her that you think it’s cute.
Another example would be if she clearly tries to work very hard in school, compliment her either on her work ethic, her determination, or her intelligence.
For this type of compliment, whatever you compliment her on has to be honest. Don’t say something you don’t mean just to find something to compliment her .

3.
Think about the things that she values in you or other people. Look back on the conversations you’ve had with her and find things to compliment her on that you know she values but thinks that she doesn’t possess. Maybe you noticed that she told you she likes how hard you fight for the things that you want, but she fights just as hard. Maybe you noticed that she said she wished she had a figure like some other girl, but you think her figure is better.
It is important to consider whether or not she actually possesses the quality you want to compliment her on. Telling her she’s good at something that she’s not will catch her notice and she’ll know you don’t mean it.

4.Compliment her personality. The best thing to compliment a girl on is her personality. This is something that she has a certain amount of control over and it is something that is intrinsically her, rather than something like clothing which usually has very little to do with her and who she is. Think about the things that you like about who she is as a person and what she does, then Compliment her on that..

5.
Compliment her accomplishments. You can also compliment her accomplishments. This is something she also has control over and that says something about who she is as a person. Think about the things that she worked hard for or things she did that you admired, like helping someone or doing the right thing in a tough situation, and compliment her on that.
Importantly, it is also something that can’t be taken away from her or that can change with time. This means that she won’t have to fear losing this quality, and can be happy when she thinks about this compliment for the rest of her life.

6.
Compliment her from your heart. You don’t have to overthink compliments. You can just compliment her naturally, by saying exactly how you feel. Speak from your heart and the perfect compliment should come out. The trick to doing this, though, is that you have to respect and value her first. It’s not respecting her that could lead you to saying something offensive.

7.
Just tell her she’s beautiful. It doesn’t have to be complex or followed up with qualifiers. You don’t have to explain what you find beautiful. Just tell her that she’s beautiful. Following this up with and “I love you” when appropriate also won’t hurt you.

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